My quiet place where I spend many hours a day…using my coping tools, and finding new ways to thank God for this gift of mental illness.
One of my readers asked yesterday how I got into a good fitness routine so I decided to blog my answer in case others were interested as well. The answer is complicated so use whatever you want for what works for you but the bottom line is to just do it!
For me it all started when I bought my fitbit zip for $50 at a weight watchers meeting and began to compete against others for daily and weekly steps. It got me into walking around 10,000 steps a day on a regular basis. From there I wanted more but it took a while to get up to 7-10 miles a day. I used to never win these friendly but competitive competitions but now I sometimes win and that is fun and encourages me to walk more.
Next thing that really helped was joining Sparkpeople almost a year ago. It is free if you want to put up with annoying ads but well worth the small investment and have better features to help with weight loss, exercise and nutrition. I started by taking challenges that led to getting even more active with strength training, yoga and pilates. From there I was hooked and regularly feeling the benefits of exercise.
Then almost 3 months ago I started to better organize my routines and fell in love with Leslie Sansone videos which are available on Youtube or you can buy a dvd on Amazon which I did both. I regularly walk her 3K which is light aerobic workout and now do her 5 mile workout 6 days a week at home. I do have a gym membership but mostly workout at home and have found some great videos on Youtube which help me to organize my workouts. I workout with Rebecca Louise, Jessica Smith and Leslie as I mentioned.
I not only have more energy throughout the day but I am in a better mood the days I workout and sleep like a baby at night. I am addicted to exercise but my body and mind thank me every day I am able to get in a good workout!
Having Schizoaffective Disorder doesn’t have to be dreary. With the help of exercise I don’t even feel like I have it some days! I just wish I could get paid for working out because the bills are piling up while I await my hearing for permanent disability…..
Hope everyone has a great day. If anyone else wants to chime in on the topic of how to get in a good exercise routine I am sure others will benefit too!
Life is like a roller coaster some days and other days I have tremendous peace. Today I was in between, neither cold or hot. I felt unorganized when I tried to bake some banana nut muffins but they came out good and I got the kitchen cleaned up.
I do feel quite a bit unorganized lately but am in the middle of many projects, taxes (blech!), a refinance for one of our rentals that I have to do so much for to save some serious money every month so I suppose it is worth it but the broker keeps asking for things, it is like a scavenger hunt each time I get an email from her!
Keeping up healthy eating takes time too and exercise has again become my daily friend for three weeks now! Today I did a core challenge and my abs are sore in a good way:) I am more motivated now than ever before to get rid of these last 25 pounds that I put on because of this disorder. I have lost 30 so far so that is great and I am managing to keep it off but it takes a lot of work!!!!
I joined an art class too; although I am not much of an artist but needed a fun hobby in between hospital visits for my dad, helping my mom and worrying about my youngest son which I will get to in a minute. We are actually working with pewter and although it is a bit tedious I am finding it relaxing and enjoyable when I am in the mood to work on it. The sketches are hard for me though because I am a perfectionist and no matter how hard I try I can’t get what is in my mind out on paper. But I am proud of myself for venturing out and taking a class and at least trying to be more creative.
As for my son- he just turned 18 and has mental health issues but not psychotic, more severe depression. He can’t get and keep a job yet, couldn’t finish high school (recently got his GED), his car died so he uses mine or walks or bikes it, missed the registration for college so isn’t in school now. He is saying he wants to go to a 4 year out of state but can’t even manage his life living with his parents. Oh my! How much I pray for him every day and worry way too much about him. I try to help him out but he just has a mind of his own.
The good news though is that now that he is an adult he is seeing my amazing psychiatrist who prescribed Wellbutrin and is keeping him on Prozac which he has taken for years. I have hope that it will work and help his motivation. Every day he sleeps in till 1 or 2 pm and just isn’t motivated to do the things he needs to do as an adult. My other two children don’t have mental disorders like him and are supporting themselves so I guess two out of three children aren’t bad. I just see his future and he is so bright and smart that I hope he can find his niche in life and not have to be supported by his parents the rest of his life. He even talked about the army but they won’t take him because of the psych meds so yet another blow. Thank goodness he isn’t suicidal…
So back to me, I need to blog more it really helps me to vent about this disorder. I do so much for others and managing a house is a full time job. The work is never done. I do feel stressed at times and other times it is smooth sailing. I probably need to see a therapist again but don’t have the money but may just decide to do it anyway. My mental health is very important to me and lately I wonder how well I am really dealing with everything. I just don’t think about it most of the time and that’s probably not a good thing.
Thanks if you read this far. I hope my readers are all doing well, staying positive despite this dastard disorder that robs us of our joy so much of the time.
Merry Christmas Eve to all!
I dedicate today and tomorrow’s blog to my dear father who I almost lost twice this year. But he is still alive although at a diminished capacity.
I love you daddy! You are the best dad in the whole world and I want everyone to know that! Even though you didn’t really ever understand my mental disorder, you were always there for me believing in me and rooting for me at every turn in my life!
Stay tuned for its sequel out in 2018!
With my daughter here visiting from Colorado we have had lots of time together and amazingly we picked up right where we left off except that I was really able to verbalize to her the truth of my condition. How I still suffer much and about what my bad days now consist of. I don’t share this with anyone.
My psychiatrist wants me to see a therapist but it is hard to trust someone…
For now being able to share with my daughter is enough. I want to be alive. I want to life life. I want to be ok…..
My husband wants me to work in the new year. We shall see…..
For now I will keep doing what I have been doing, work intermixed with fun and relaxing things. Today I walked five miles and it felt great in the cool weather. Enjoyed an old favorite candy bar while walking, chewy and peanut butter anyone heard of an abazaba?
Anyway, even got all my Christmas cards done ready to go out tomorrow. Feels good and I have a sense of accomplishment.
I have had a few delusions of grandeur and felt like people and the angels and saints are watching me at all times. But it doesn’t interfere with my functioning level, it just is.
God is a huge part of my day. I pray the rosary every day and pray throughout the day to the heavens to hear me and have mercy on this poor soul afflicted with mental illness.
I go places through the day and no one suspects that I have a mental disorder. So that is good.
Well good night you all. I will be posting a dedication to my father on Christmas so stay tuned.
Wishing you all peace and love!