I lost sight of the target today and it was unfamiliar it has been so long…
There was a major stessor in my life with one of my kids happening since July 5th. It was relieved tonight at 6:45 pm. Long story short, there was a group (25 people) squatting in one of our rentals that would not leave. Until I finally was so stressed that I asked my friend for prayer and within an hour they were gone. My daughter is moving in and I’m ready for her to start her new life away from me.
I still get catatonic from my psychotic or Schizophrenia symptoms; I finally recognized this today. It’s like I am paralyzed. Can’t move, can’t think what will help, can’t ask for prayer, can’t take care of myself or my pups. It’s terrible.
I have so much to do, and so many problems to take care of. But instead I am blogging because it helps me sort through my thoughts.
As I reflect upon this situation I wonder why we had to suffer so much. Is there anything I could have done different? No there was not. I didn’t let it get to me until today. It is good to have a prayer friend, but I have so many prayers.
I feel like I am under attack. In fact I know I am as I sit here tonight (no longer frozen) awaiting a call from my doctor. I will not go into details because I don’t want to give myself attention.
Bad things happen to good people. And I am no different. I hope I am good people, I certainly try.
I just need a break from my constant attacks for whatever reason for a day.
Thursday this week will also bring answers about my youngest son. How I love all my children so very much, but my youngest is indeed the light of my life. How I lift him up in prayer for his life, his future and for more time with him on this earth. He helps me greatly these days.
Tonight I am going to finish my health history for the homeopathic treatment. Perhaps all these attacks of a physical nature mainly are to prevent this and I have to fight for it? We shall see.
I did lose hope for a little while today, but God gave me a friend and it means so much it is an understatement.
Peace to all of my readers!