A Story of Life Love and terminal illness Part one

When I first reached out to help Pammie B. A kind lady on Facebook two weeks ago, I had no idea what I was getting into. The bond we share of love, laughter and sisterhood is unbreakable!

I wake up and she will somehow know and message me. I will be up late wishing she was too and she will message me. You see she is terminally ill and I decided day one of our unique bond , that I would take every single day as a gift for both of us. And we have done so, praying for each other, praying with one another and laughing and crying as the mood fits.

I am not afraid of death, so this friendship does not frighten me. I plan to go visit her soon in Missouri and pray for God’s will in all.

We have so much in common it is scary!

Yesterday and today I asked her for topics for my blog. Yesterday was on coping with loss as she has lost another dear friend and much family over a very short period. I have too.

So today I felt to ask her for a topic again and she shared with me if I could write on death anxiety and all this entails. It is a heart wrenching story and not for the light hearted. Read on if you dare to be inspired by her most incredible story of life, love and terminal illness.

Her story began when she was born and I thank God for her mother and father giving birth to her! All she has been through her whole life has made her who she is today and I think she’s pretty darn special, hopeful and not one who gives up.

We are writing this together. Her providing details and observations and me weaving it as best as possible into a story to give others hope for we are all terminally ill, all of us are going to die eventually so this story is relevant to all.

She begins “well just knowing that I can die, fear is a trigger, but the thing is it hits very fast and u can’t control it and get my mind back to a good place “ how does one speak to that? even though she knows God has got this, the anxiety is overwhelming at times.

Like I know I will pass into eternal life one day but for someone to give me a date like tomorrow or six months, how would I feel? I think I would be pretty happy with my current life and not make many changes but the anxiety is understandable. The how and when and where and with who would likely tear me apart. For me the only thing that would get me through it is knowing that my dad is waiting for me on the other side!

She also describes it as coming on fast and admits she is clostrophobic and fears to be in a casket. For me I choose to be cremated so there’s that but this fear I believe comes from the enemy. We will be set free from our earthly body one day and soar with the eagles and watch over our loved ones on earth. I think I will start planning a huge party for whenever I pass. They can party on my grave because I am not there. No I am with my loved ones and more importantly God in heaven.

If anyone can share on here how one copes with such a fear it is greatly appreciated!

I will end today’s blog with her words as she has answered her own question!

On the other hand I’ve been thinking of a pure heart and pure motive in my daily life. Having the right attitude and doing things for the right reason.

It don’t get much better than that.

Stay tuned for part two of this series. She is resting right now after babysitting her granddaughter all day. I worry a bit naturally but I took a minute to cry and pray for God to give us some visits. But even if she passed today I know she would agree her day was well spent with her Willow ❤️🙏😢



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