Almost Midnight Musings…

Hello world!

For those of you have followed me for a while you will remember my many blogs that were titled “Midnight Musings”. I would post or publish a blog with my random thoughts, not at all concerned about SEO or content or anything but my rambling while psyhcotic. Well tonight I am resurrecting this theme for various reasons.

I’m not psychotic but have a lot to share. I may ramble but this is for me and anyone interested in my sane mind that can still get creative hopefully.

Where to start? My new friend that I met the other day from my Facebook group (the only group and reason I am on Facebook), my 4 hour drive over the next two days to get some relief from my knee pain or my story of when I heard my first voice. Why not all three?

I will start with my new friend. I don’t have many and actually the only friend I feel like I have lately is Joey Talks on Youtube who I pay to be my friend lol. Just kidding, he is a great guy but I will admit I am lacking in the friend department. I don’t mind because I have been so antisocial because of the negative symptoms of Schizophrenia the last few years. Also every time I get a friend, I end up losing them one way or the other and it is always painful when they leave. I have never left a friendship but it seems that God wants me to focus on my family, my home and gardens, my pups and my blog so there is not a lot of time for friends anyway. However, it is really nice to have made a new friend who has time for me and I have time for her. I have hope for this friendship, which I haven’t had one like this for years really.

I do have my WordPress friends though so feel free to comment, ask questions which I love, and send me an email if you are struggling or want to vent. I am much more open now than ever to not just spend time with myself but to actually be a part of the world. I sometimes wonder if the reason I don’t get comments very often is because of one of three reasons: I shall share my theories with you all.

The first one is that you all are very shy and just observe and like my content but I have no idea if this is true of most of you or not and may never know and that is ok. I will keep writing but feel free to get in touch any way using my contact form above or sending me an email at: victoriamariealonso@yahoo.com

My other theory is that some of you might feel intimidated by my strange existence and just don’t know what to say. That’s ok too! If this is the case please know that any question is better than no question if one has a question. I have not had a boring or easy life and love to explain my actions even if they only make sense to me. Does that make sense? I have had more emails than comments, but I go seasons without any so feel free to email or comment and I will get back to you! Mind you I am about to go to Mexico for over a week but will still be checking my email and blogging if possible. I have no idea the internet situation so we shall see.

Or nobody cares, which I don’t think is true at all but the old me would totally buy into that theory.

Enough on that. Do what you like and I will be happy to keep writing about my strange life.

I’m actually past my bedtime, so will blog the other two things very soon. I have to get up early tomorrow to get a cortizone shot in my knees that are in a lot of pain from arthritis. And it is an hour away with the doctor only doing one knee a day. So that makes for 4 hours in the car but I get to talk on the way with my friend so time will be flying by!

My story of when I heard my first voice will have to wait. A question on Quora made me think of it and it is a good story of my first appearance of symptoms of schizophrenia, which supported my later in life voices and delusions that are all gone away but I think it is an interesting story that needs to be told.

Have a great night/day and I will write sooner rather than later:)

pax

Victoria

p.s. what do you think of my new laptop? I think it’s pretty cool! and much easier to type on!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s