Let’s talk about suicide…

Today is a new day and my mantra once again is I won’t give up! Even better I won’t give up and I will give life my all, starting last night when I deep cleaned the kitchen. There is always something to do but I don’t always feel like doing it.

Who I am…

I am a daughter, wife, mother, friend and hopefully a good person. I do not hurt others on purpose. Never have, never will. I am the type of person to put others needs ahead of mine. This is just how I am. But no more these days. My needs have to be taken care of […]

The facade continues…

I put on a brave face, do what needs to get done minimally but I am suffering so much right now with the loss of my brother in law. I am not numb, no I feel the sadness and wish I could be joyful and fun for my sister but alas I am not that […]

I think I will never doubt again but…

life happens people die, people suffer, people celebrate, life keeps going even after a very sad event such as my brother in law passing last week… i am fighting depression, not exercising at all but have been getting fresh air and sunlight. Too low to put in any effort but making dinner tonight. I get […]

Am I the only life I can save?

Or am I responsible not out of duty but rather a pure love for others and firstly God almighty for all to be saved? I believe in Jesus and many do but not all. I do not believe that a benevolent kind God would ever cast anyone into hell. I do pray for the whole […]

The world as I see it…

It, the world needs a lot of help. We can choose to give or take or just stay the same it is up to us. Today I gave in big and little ways. Most people are kind i have found and am happy that my family is so close and giving… but this is not […]

In a quandary…

I’m stuck right now… things were moved into my meditation room and it is really upsetting me, the dogs don’t know where to lay down. One finally chose the bed ha ha In extreme grief over my brother in law. It’s not the same as a friend passing. No it is much more for me […]

R.I.P. JAMES 11-7-2020

I don’t want to die by suicide but still at times suicide does cross my mind. I don’t want to ever put my kids through this or my husband or family so I am going to take the next month to really research ways to fight this statistic. Does anybody know how high it is for people with schizophrenia?