Success at last!!!

Dear readers, I hope this blog finds you well!

I am now back on my original medication Risperdal with Latuda and have changed my anti-anxiety med and am doing positively great!

I am sleeping 7-8 hours (opposed to 12 or 13)

I am getting up every day and doing the things I have wanted to do but haven’t done for a year.  I mean I had to try Clozapine because others have had such great success with it but for me my cocktail combination is working so I am not going to deviate probably ever again.  Just for an example today I woke up at 6:30 made lunch for hubbie and me and my dear daughter who are going to the airport because she is going to Colorado to visit (like it much better with her here and her just visiting us every 6 months!), brushed the dogs, gardened, laundry, blogging, cleaned both bathrooms and more!

I used to take so long to wake up and would just sit and surf the web for literally hours but now once again there just isn’t enough time in the day to do all the things I want to do.

In fact I am so passionate about life that I have decided to apply for a teaching position at the local community college as a Sociology 101 professor!  I feel like I will be able to work and am so excited to get all the paperwork in!

Life is good and my hubbie has noticed too.  The house is much cleaner and tidier, cooking at home pretty much every day and I am going to the gym 5 or 6 days a week.  I spoiled myself with the upgraded membership to get the hydromassage every time I go.  I am taking such good care of myself.  I also have hope that I will shed the weight I gained these past few months!

So there, finally a good update!

Email or comment any questions.  I am once again back on the circuit and will be blogging more hopefully as the urge arises!

Pax

Victoria

Dedication today for Anne

Dear readers,

I hope todays’s post finds you all well for I am not well which I offer up my cowardice and pain for a dear friend who passed last week.  Words cannot describe this excellent human being who I pray is now in heaven gardening with the angels!

She was fiesty but used it to help others.

She was good and always treated others with respect if it was due.

I find it very hard to put into words why I was so impressed with this rare specimen who no longer is here in her earthly body but oh how I miss her so!

I dedicate today’s post to Anne, a dear soul who fought with God and I am sure she won.

I will now share my cowardice and suffering as of recent and I offer it up for her soul which may still be in purgatory and is in need of my prayers and offerings of my current suffering coming off of Clozapine.

I am currently taking 25 mg every other night and it was the second night that I went without.  The first night I couldn’t sleep at all and the second night was the same.  I perspired in every crevice and itched so terribly I just wanted to be dead rather than spend another minute in bed with sleep at an arm length’s away…

For some Clozapine is a cure.  But God has other plans for this person with Schizoaffective Disorder.  It caused pain in all my joints especially my hands upon wakening were like stretching out a roll of toothpaste that is long past it’s due.

These are called extrapyrmadial symptoms of which I suffered much.  It also caused heavy sedation.  After taking my prescribed dosage, I would pass into sleepy land quickly and sleep 11 to 12 hours every night.  I was on this medicine since October last year trying to see if I would adjust  because I so wanted to be cured.

But it was not so so here I sit early in the am, with another sleepless night under my belt, my eyes aching, my side throbbing, hot and cold in the same minute.  Oh I do not want to complain to my God.  So I will stop now and ask him for His will be done in all areas of my life.

Today will be a chill day, getting ready some flowers for Anne’s memorial tomorrow which she did not want…  But the best of us do not desire that I have found.  I do need to go to the pharmacy though to fill a prescription for some more Latuda.  I am on the max psychotic dosage 160 and don’t have enough for tomorrow.  I don’t like to drive when I haven’t slept and oh yeah the extreme anxiety that hits when it may also causes me much suffering which I also lift up for Anne…

Have a good day readers, I shall try to make the most of it….

As usual Pax

Victoria

Featured Schizophrenia charity

Dear readers, I have not done well on Clozapine and am slowly weaning off of it which has proven to be the hardest thing I have done yet since being diagnosed.  It causes extreme anxiety and agitation and last night I was up the whole night unable to sleep because it was the first time I didn’t take my little quarter pill lol.

But behind every cloud there is a silver lining and this cloud has brought me to my favorite person lately and her charity. CureSZ is an awesome non profit which works hard to research and help find a cure for Schizophrenia.  I won’t ask for money for myself even though I have been turned down again for disability.  Money is more than tight but I trust God will provide.  But I will ask for money for great organizations such as CureSZ.  Please if you donate to help find cures for mental disorders such as Schizophrenia, consider donating to them and do what I plan to do and that is set up a monthly amount to make it easy and make a difference in an outstanding organization.  Please see the link below to start making a difference.

https://www.gofundme.com/c3hwh2-understanding-schizophrenia

Thank you ahead for anything you can do to support CureSZ!  I plan to give ten dollars a week which isn’t much but anything you can do will make a difference.

I always plan to blog more and that is my desire but have not been on line much these days.  I will provide updates to my new medication Vraylar which I started on last night.

For those of you who follow me thank you for your likes and messages.  All of them are appreciated and my heart thanks you all!

Pax

Victoria