Hope has returned!

 

My last few posts have been rather depressing but I don’t dare apologize for there are times when we will feel bad and it is better to be honest about how one feels rather than to just lie and say I am ok.  I wasn’t ok and do still have days when I am not ok but I am getting through these hard times with a new hope that I believe is answered prayer.

Prayer is never wasted, no it shakes the heart of God I believe and shaking has occurred!

Despite the ups and downs with my dad’s condition I have been able to get off my duff and accomplish many things.  Not only that but I also feel I am doing much better now thanks to a few pro-active things I have done.  Mainly, I have stopped feeling sorry for myself and forgiven myself and others for many mistakes I and others have made.  This is freeing…

We are not human machines made perfect.  No, we mess up, don’t always say the right thing and often doubt our abilities.  And this is for everyone, not just those with a mental disorder like so many of us on here.  I have many friends I have met through my blog who suffer from this disorder or have loved ones afflicted and I cherish that moment when I check my email and I find an email from a friend I already had or when it is a new person either sharing their story or asking me to share mine through many different venues.

I have gotten really good feedback from others that I am making a difference so that is just super.  I have always thought, “if I can just help one person by sharing my story it is worth it”.  And I know I have helped at least one person so I will continue to blog and share my ups and downs on here and wherever else God leads me.

I have new hope that this world we live in will get better because of me and others like me who genuinely care about others.  Thank you for being a part of my recovery!

Pax

Victoria

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Sad times right now…

My dad is dying in the hospital right now.  I wish to dedicate this blog to my dad who has been there for me more times than not.  All the good times we have had, our adventures, our outings, our discussions about anything and everything.  I will miss you so much dad but I know and believe you will always be with me in my heart.  You have taught me how to live life to the fullest, to not take love for granted or to waste time on needless tasks.  How much I love you daddy.

I am taking really good care of myself during this hard time.  I am exercising, eating right, not isolating, and trying to keep up with the mundane tasks of life while the whole time I just want to be by his side….