New outlook

Coming from wanting to die recently to now has been quite a journey.  I have a new outlook on life, one of hope and recovery… again.

I get up each day and look at my plan from the night before and get busy after some coffee of course.  I work a little bit at each task and reward myself often with breaks.  Today it was the roses in the front.  It wasn’t working out so well, but I kept going despite the thorns that were attacking my hands and pushed through getting through pruning 2 rose bushes.  My son will pick up the cuttings and tomorrow I will shoot for two more.  Each day offers new opportunities to do the things around my house which I have let go of with my recent hospitalizaiton.  The list is long but I feel as long as I plug away at each task diligently it might all get done before I return to work in Feb hopefully if my psychiatrist releases me.  The first part of my time off I just exercised but am now extending my well being to these mundane tasks.  Music helps too and making time each day for family and friend connections is also important to my well being.

My therapist has me keeping track of my moods with a daily journal and I find it to be very helpful.  I am also working on a new article on my recent hospitalization which I will share on here as soon as it is done.  I will start with an outline and just work at it each day until it is done.  The hard part for me is getting started.  Well I am off to shower and get ready for sushi with my oldest son who I have not connected with for a while.  I am excited to hear about his new job and how life has been treating him!

There is hope for those of us afflicted with this disorder.  The most important thing is to NEVER give up, no matter what.

Peace and blessings to all of you!

Pax

Victoria

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