At times I am still in my own world, but for the most part I function well. I hold a job, take care of my three children and husband and live my life symptom free. I know that I have an illness and with medication am able to live a normal life. I wake up, go to work each day, and manage a household. I am not perfect in my endeavours but I am able to be happy and enjoy life. I take my medication every day, despite feeling fine and work hard to make connections with all my loved ones. But this disorder is debilitating. I never want to be psychotic again that is for sure. I have recently let go some of my final delusions. It has been painful but necessary for my recovery. I told my psychiatrist every thing and even though these delusions were not harmful I feel like they did not serve me well. It is hard to believe I am not special and not on a mission from God. Yet, there is so much to life worth living. But I get my most enjoyment from helping others so in this I am well pleased. The responses I have received from this blog are overwhelming. I get to do so much to help others understand this disorder and I get to touch other’s lives just by sharing my story. I encourage anyone reading this blog to write in and share with me your experience. I am non-judgemental in this regard. Yes, I suffer still as we all do but I am in this with you and love to get emails or comments on this blog. Together we can get through this…
Pax,
Victoria
p.s. this blog has gotten over a thousand views from 26 different countries. Wow!
I can be reached at victoriamariealonso@yahoo.com