Times are tough… yet thank you to all!

First had to quit my job, too stressful at a busy store.  Also, my mom needs my help right now after her knee surgery.  But I like to work so I am not going to give up on getting a lower stress part time job:)

Been getting a lot of emails lately though which really helps me to get out of my own life and work at expanding knowledge of this dastard disorder!  I am going to be doing an interview with Health360 along with Josh Rivedal whose book I wrote a chapter in, along with 49 other mentally afflicted individuals.  The book IM’possible Project  comes out in November so that is perfect timing for an interview.  I like doing them, voice only though, no camera for me.

I also connected with a lovely lady whose story I have known about for years but we finally connected today and it was great to talk to someone else who has gone through recovery from this disorder…  Very refreshing and the beginning of what I think will be a great friendship.  If you want to know her story check it out at:

http://www.bethanyyeiser.com/my-story/

And here is a link to her nonprofit, the CURESZ Foundation: https://curesz.org/

The great part about keeping a blog for so many years is that it comes in waves working with others either with others afflicted, or researchers and students, and can’t forget about the loved ones who suffer as much as us if not more because most of them are mothers but also include sisters too.  I am feeling nostalgic.  There have been some great memories with this blog.  I don’t regret one post and appreciate every like and comment:)  I answer all my emails and though we may part ways down the road I hope we are both richer for the connection…

Pax

Victoria

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Reentering the workforce very slowly…

Happy Saturday and weekend to all!

I am chilling with Jason Mraz but will get busy soon as I have a lot on my list of things to do…

I start my new very part time job on Tuesday, working ten hours for Macy’s, training this week for twelve hours and then ability to work more hours after that.  I am kind of excited though and love the fact that I get to wear all my nice fashionable work clothes again which I saved.

Working even 40 hours at minimum wage will not affect my permanent disability which I should find out soon if I qualify or not.  God’s will be done in all things though.  If I don’t get it I will have to really think about what I am going to do with my time…  Not too worried, it all somehow works out in the end always anyways.

Here is my list of things to do today~

Make lavendar goat soap

Give the dogs a bath

eat lunch

visit my mom in the hospital

visit my dad at extended care

Walmart for prescription and return

Confession

Walk 30 minutes

dinner

Home to downsize file cabinet and get bedroom ready for all new furniture my husband’s sister is giving us!

Whew!  Hope I get it all done but if not there is always tomorrow…and with that I will leave my readers with an Irish blessing!

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face;
the rains fall soft upon your fields
and until we meet again,
may God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Pax

Victoria

A very stressful day but made it, glad for a new day though…

Yesterday was very hard and long for me.  My mom had knee replacement surgery and had to be there at 5:45 am, I didn’t sleep much the night before in fact stayed up late to hang out with my 18 yr old son….

So the day was spent waiting for her to come out of surgery and she is frail mind you so there was that scare.  But she did better than fine.  The surgery was three hours though and had to wait a while to see her in recovery.  Some other stressful things to help her get settled but I got through it and went to bed at 9:00pm last night and slept in till 9.

Today is a new day and I am happy to report she is walking around a little with little pain and a very cheery countenance!

I am glad for new days especially after a hard day like yesterday.  Makes me appreciate things more.  Little things like my ice water and lavendar scents make me happy.  Gardened a little today, watering and prepping for new fall plants.

I have my other hobbies as well such as cleaning my house in depth.  Got my list and getting through it one project at a time.  Even painted some indoors to spruce things up.

My other hobbies (goat soap making and other natural products) and collaging are there too when I get done with the deep cleaning of my house and the gardening and yuck weeding out front.

We might be having a party over here in October so my husband is doing his part getting the yards looking good and getting rid of trash and junk!  We have been married 25 years and although he doesn’t really understand my mental disorder, he is there for me in other ways like leaving me be yesterday for the most part when I was just done with the day!

Hope everyone has a good end of September as October is right around the corner, birthday time soon!  48 years young!!!

Pax

Victoria

 

Essential oils brighten my day:)

I bought a pack of essential oils with lemon, rosemary, cedarwood, eucalyptus, orange, peppermint, lavender, stress relief and more…

I have been using them in various recipes that I got out of eat dirt by Dr. Josh Axe.  Today I made deodorant with coconut oil, baking soda and rosemary.  Put it in an old container and have cheap good smelling deodorant!

Tomorrow it is going to be my favorite activity with lavender.  I am making goat soap the easy way and even adding color and lavender dried flowers to them.

Today was a good day.  I painted my kitchen cabinets and the kitchen is so much brighter now!  Feels clean!  Scrubbed my countertops too and got rid of what I don’t use that was taking up space mainly cds.  I am obsessed with Jason MrAz house shows.

I am not always motivated to do jobs around the house or in the gardens so I take the motivation when it comes… and lately because of the CBD oil and other herbal remedies plus the essential oils my motivation level is quite high.

I even applied to two jobs this week that won’t affect my disability if I get it working retail at department stores.  Seems chill.  Not much pay but right now anything helps!

Today is Padre Pio Feast Day September 23 and he answered a novena prayer I was saying with my daughter in a big way!  God is so good!

My disorder is in check right now.  I still take my medicines twice a day faithfully and everything else I do on top of it is just supplementation not instead of.  I have resigned to the fact that I will be taking Risperdal and Latuda along with Lexapro and my anti-anxiety drugs every day for the rest of my life.

Finding creative ways to make life pleasureable is half the fun, the other half is living my life with a purpose!

Still waiting for several things to happen, my second book should be published 2018, and I will find out hopefully this month if I qualify for permanent disablility or not.

My mom is also having surgery for a knee replacement this next week so appreciate any prayers anyone can muster!

Life is good!  Doesn’t have to be a pity party even when I am unmotivated….

Pax

Victoria

 

C

Quitting smoking, finances and art oh my:)

Good morning to all my readers!

It is a special day for me, will share more about this at the end.

I have quit smoking with a plan and am on day 5 with not one puff!  I am doing a little vaping at 3mg, my CBD oil which helps me to be more creative, and nicotine lozenges.  I am doing this not only for myself but for my children namely my son Dominic….

Finances are not good, but I have a plan for that too.  Applied for a retail job last night, think it might be enjoyable to work at a department store for 20-30 hours a week and still help my mom and visit my dad.  Need the money and the low pay won’t affect my permanent disability if I get it.  It has been one month since the hearing, with one to two months to go to get the verdict.  The lawyer made a strong argument in my favor why I can’t work gainfully.  I think I will win but until I know for sure it is a little nervewracking.

But I have been keeping busy with my collages, lately of loved ones for birthday cards and made a family heart shaped collage for me to look at when I want to smoke.  It really helps.  Have been making meditation cards for an upcoming show also, have about 20 so far with a goal to make 20 more.  I do this when my husband is watching tv and I sit at the kitchen table in the shared room and collage, cut and paste these beautiful pictures of anything and everything from butterflies to a mosque.  Lots of nature pictures too and peaceful images.  Don’t know what to sell them for as they cost nearly nothing to make.  Spent 18$ on a laminator and ten bucks on the sleeves.  Oh well, not in it for the money anyway.  If anyone wants me to make them one email me and I can custom make one for just cost of shipping 1$ or so…  victoriamariealonso@yahoo.com

So I am staying busy while I await the verdict… gardening some, sparking, walking, cleaning house, sanding cabinets to paint in the kitchen, and getting rid of anything that isn’t nailed down  ha ha.  Also been shopping quite a bit on Amazon, love their lightening deals.

Anxiety is managed at the moment and delusions have lessened again thanks be to God and Mary whose special feast day is today.  Our Lady of Sorrows pray for us!

Hope everyone is doing well too!

Pax

Victoria

CBD oil for Schizophrenia

I have been vaping pure CBD oil for about a month now and have noticed significant changes in my symptoms.  The messages from God have ceased to a great degree and although the delusions come and go they are mostly not believed thanks to many proofs.  CBD oil not only helps with the positive symptoms but also the negative one.  It gets me moving and helps me to be more creative too!

My cousin has done significant research on its usage and correlation of helping people with Schizophrenia so I tried it and noticed a huge change although I am still taking my antipsychotic medication and probably never will stop!

Going to mention it to my pdoc next visit as last time I saw him I was receiving many messages from God and he was mildly concerned and wanted to see me sooner than usual.  He’ll be glad things are back to normal well whatever that is anyway ha ha.

I have many projects I am working on right now, planting a lemon tree, sanding and painting the cabinets which is taking forever and eventually painting both bathrooms cream.

Well hope you are  all doing well.  I am still making collages and have begun personalizing them:)

Happy Labor Day 2017!

Pax

Victoria